Anger
OK, this is going to be my first real entry in a while. I’ve been very off recently. My anger has increased quite a bit. And I’m worried. I’m worried because I’m not normally an angry person. I consider myself nice, reasonable, and calm, with the occasional spurts of crazy. But I have been so fucking angry for the last few weeks. And I think I finally realized what the problem is.
My anger started around October 12th-13th. There were minor annoyances before then that pissed me off, but my anger never reached the extent it is now. Something happened around those days that really set me off. You may be able to guess what it is by looking at my last entry. I don’t want to go into too much detail. But since then, I’ve been getting angry over EVERY. LITTLE. THING. And I hate it. I don’t like being angry. It’s not who I am. All of my anger stems back to an incident that occurred around those days (as a psychologist in training, it’s be bad if I couldn’t find the source of my anger, hehe.) I just need to find a way to work through it. I’m going to try to see somebody at the health services either tomorrow or sometime really soon. I don’t want to be this angry. I feel like people know that I’m angry and thus don’t want to be around me. I also feel like all of my close friends either transferred or left. And I’m already kind of a loner. I’m just isolating myself even more. I know there are a lot of people who like me, but the mood I’m in right now just makes it hard to remember that. Sorry I’m so emo, I’ve just had a very rough couple of weeks.
I also have A LOT of work to do. And sometimes I think I’m not smart enough to do it, or that I’m not worthy to be a college senior, like everyone is better than I am. And I know that’s not true either. Damn, is Aunt Flow visiting soon or something? Maybe that has something to do with it…
Also, I had to make a semi-goodbye topic on CR. I just don’t have the time to go on there as much anymore. I love that place, so that kind of sucks. *sigh* I can’t wait to work out these issues with somebody. I feel like total shit right now.
I’m so sorry this is an emo post. It’s been so long since I wrote a post, and this is what you’re given. I’m really sorry. I hope I’m just having an off-weekend and that this doesn’t become a chronic problem.
All right, thanks for reading, and so sorry once again that this is emo.
